Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen has it all, unapologetic sexual exploitation, wildly embarrassing racial stereotypes, and quite frankly too much humping for my taste.

The first of the cast members that is exploited of course is Megan Fox. Although it goes without saying that she is extremely attractive, Michael Bay takes her attributes and goes completely overboard in featuring them. It's tantamount to a Snoop Dogg video.


Although the unnecessary objectification of Megan Fox is at least pleasing to the male audience myself included, what was certainly not pleasing to anyone at all is what is now known as The John Turturro ass incident.

In many ways the incident encapsulates the main problem with this film: A lack of priority and focus. As a common theme throughout the film Bay decided to value crude humor above the fluidity of the action scenes.

Bay however does not stop at sexual exploitation in his attempts at crude humor. In addition to the exploitation he also added two politically offensive characters, the "twins" Skids and Mudflap which he is now finding himself defending.

It is clear that these two characters were intended to serve as comedic relief. However instead of relief they provided nothing but disbelief. A disbelief that characters so obnoxious and insulting could possibly exist.

All in all, the Transformers sequel is a very sexually frustrated film. From the humping chihuahua to the humping deceptacon robot and finally to the sexual advances of "Alice" played by the lovely Isabel Lucas on "Sam" played by Shia LeBeouf, it quickly becomes evident that the movie is in many ways like a big dry hump, all movement with no payoff or money shot.

Still though, the movie has already made over 30 percent of its $200 million budget back on Wednesday alone. So it looks like Bay's humping might have paid off after all.

From left to right: Images via Nerve.com, Webring.com, News.Popstar.com, Allocine.fr, and Collider.com

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

Every once in a while there comes a film so perfectly average that it stands impervious to criticism.

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian is a prime example.

In perhaps one of the most unexpected moves this summer, the Night at the Museum sequel has managed to become number one at the box office.

This is no coincidence. According to the New York Times, the film managed to bring in $70 million in ticket sales, obliterating the heavyweight competition brought on by Terminator Salvation.

This film's recipe for extraordinary mediocrity comes from tolerable performances by Ben Stiller and the rest of the cast peppered with remarkable and innovative special effects.

At the same time however, this film should not be sold short. The endeavor itself is not a complete disaster. The plot is crafted, the characters' personalities are somewhat memorable, and the overall concept of the film is relatively original. Hence its opening weekend success.

We all can recognize the film's basic storyline from countless other family adventure films. However it is director Shawn Levy's changes and tweaks to that basic storyline that demonstrates his true genius in producing and selling a film.

These tweaks cause the movie to fall into a loophole where it is impossible to determine whether it is valuable or a robbery of both time and money. This film is an anomaly of borderline originality and the cliche.

Angels and Demons

Director Ron Howard has clumsily destroyed the beauty and the originality of author Dan Brown's truly engaging avant-garde masterpiece, Angels and Demons. The film is timid, watered-down and forgettable.



This is disconcerting for several reasons:

As far as mind-blowing summer blockbuster potential is concerned, Dan Brown's Angels and Demons is superior to the Da Vinci Code. The novel itself is a work of art, it is more fast-paced and enigmatic, it's plot structure is meticulous. From the prologue to the ending one is engaged and committed to the story.

Not so much with the film adaptation.

The film's quality can be described by its sub-par opening weekend revenue. According to Entertainment Weekly, the movie only made $48 million in its opening weekend, that is about half of what X-Men Origins: Wolverine made about a month ago. We should not be surprised to see this number drop considerably over the next few weeks.

Howard was unable to translate Brown's carefully calculated plot into the film. The changes he made for the film adaptation destroyed the very identity of Angels and Demons itself.

Brown's novels lure the reader in before the first page is even turned. The cruel and mysterious murder of physicist Leonardo Vetra (changed to Silvano Bentivoglio in the film) is the main event which prompts the reader to actually care about the story and continue reading it.

The murder does not occur in the beginning of the movie, instead the film opens with a seemingly endless scene of the pope's funeral and a science laboratory. The audience is left disconnected from the plot and as a result will hesitate to invest any time into the movie.

Common knowledge maintains that a film is rarely better or as good as the book. The lack of vision which is definitive of this project perpetuates that stereotype.

Star Trek

This summer is already delivering a very promising set of cinematographic works of art. Case in point: Star Trek.



According to the New York Times, this film has grossed $76.5 million in its opening weekend. It is not difficult to see why. This film backs up its box office numbers with a legendary storyline and passionate performances from the cast.

Although Star Trek's opening weekend performance was second to this year's X-Men Origins: Wolverine, which raked in $85 million during its own opening weekend, the film has still managed to bring the franchise out of its geeky stereotypical pop culture basement and into the hearts of awed movie goers.
Star Trek introduces those of us unfamiliar with the franchise to a whole new universe, a refreshing dimension of science fiction.

This of course is partially due to the presentation and creative vision of producer J.J. Abrams. Abrams has been able to take advantage of advances in film-making technology to express a very impressive concept that was once misunderstood and in many ways disregarded.

In addition to the extraordinary special effects, Star Trek's real appeal lies in its exploration of intelligent life. This is a characteristic unique to the science fiction genre and is the cornerstone of this film's originality.

Star Trek is an epic tale that encapsulates what it means to discover one's purpose in life. It lays out the conflicts that we struggle against on a daily basis, the battles within ourselves and each other.